Sometimes you just let a page take over. This page happened when I was in one of our creative circle chats. It just fell together.
Chute, all of life is just a bag of mysteries. Things happen that we have no idea the WHY of it. I think that is why religions came to be: to explain what happens that we have no reference for. This is just me thinking about why of religion and why spirituality was not enough.
Religion is “the shared reverence for the supernatural, sacred, or spiritual as well as the symbols, rituals, and worship that are associated with it”. -Frans de Waal, primatologist
Religion was a cultural adaptation to unite, to encourage, to instill ways to bear how hard life was. Perhaps it was a way to control communities. Perhaps it came out of need to make reasons for chaos that life was and still is. Perhaps it is a way for a culture to get people to gain some self-control through peer-control. For whatever reason, human beings seem to need something/someone to blame things on, or to give reason to, to give order to, to unite themselves under a common set of goals.
Researchers found that religion began showing up in research in the early ancient days when first man and his belongings have been unearthed. As human beings and Mother Earth evolved, religion, or belief in something that resides beyond natural evolved as well. Religions became more and more politicized as they evolved. Then came wars over religions that are still with us today.
For me, the hypocrisy drove me to stop my affiliation with any organized religion(s). I lost the sense of my own soul under the control of those who wished to own it. I came to a place where religion wounded me in a soulful way when I divorced my husband and they put religious pressure on me. The opposing lawyer even tried to bring up that I would not bring the children up in THE CHURCH if I gained custody of the kids (7). They were immediately shut down by the judge and I was given sole custody of the four little ones and joint custody of the three older ones. And, no, I did not bring the children up in a religion that was guilt-based. It took me years to completely cut all the internal/spiritual ties that were so deeply embedded but bit by bit I assumed ownership of my own soul with no need for intermediaries. It was so freeing. It allowed me to have a more personal, deeper, loving relationship with Creator.
My experience with my middle daughter taught me that some people need religion and I never encouraged nor attempted to turn her or any of my children away from the religion. She needed religion to help her, or so I thought. It did not become sustained and it did not help her fight her demons but, for a while, she found strength in something beyond man. I realize that some people do, yes, need religion in order to cope and keep hope.
My not needing religion did not make me better than any others. It made me a better person, a better mother, because I was not obsessed with perfection. I dealt with life raw and real and took absolute ownership of my own decisions and choices rather than have something else to blame. It took years for me to not feel guilty over spiritual things. But, oh, the freedom of spirit was so empowering and remains so.
This page represents the shadow side and the bright and more personal discernment of how those decisions and choices either led me to be more aware of taking care of Mother Earth and others as the highest command. It made me a better person, indeed, to be caring and helpful without prejudice or without hidden agendas, without guilt.
I wish you spiritual balance, a sense of belonging, a sense of hope and joy and adoration of spiritual things however/wherever you feel the best at doing so.
© Carol Desjarlais 26.5.21
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