We are at the point of covid exhaustion. Oh, we have done our best. We quickly decided on our bubble, have kept each other from dying of boredom and late night bacon sandwiches, Our Blood Pressure is high, our sugars are high, we are lethargic, we are sad, we are missing our families and friends, we are missing travel to warmer climes. We are burning out. Some of us may be all of these things. Some may not. But everyone has to be psychologically tired of a year of restrictions and anxiety. It is starting to get old…very old. And don’t even say the words “New Normal”.
We are bombarded with news of vaccines, yet, absolutely no information of when, where, how, is being talked about. One time we hear “Spring”, then “Fall”, and they keep changing up news about the vaccines and effectiveness versus non-effectiveness. We hear that there is a shortage. We hear we should have a second booster, then we hear that it might not be needed. We hear conspiracy theories from ‘antivaxers’, we hear about those who are not rule-keepers, and “help is on the way’, and how it will not, immediately help anyways until everyone is vaccinated. Life is about quantity not quality right now and it is weighing heavy on so many of us.
Yes, vaccines were made and successfully took care of polio, smallpox, measles, but the antivaxers are causing a rise in all of these again. And there are more and more angry responses to pretty much everything as we begin to project that frustration on others and other things. Stress is becoming huge. Those of us who truly kept the rules, formed our small bubble, and only do necessary shopping in one place once a week, and follow with serious clean-up within even one’s house, are getting frustrated with those who do NOT follow the rules. Some have gone so far as blaming ethnic groups. We have become a nation where we are told to report non-rule followers. It feels pretty ominous.
Stressors are normal. It is a huge part of life. Stress usually comes, lasts a short time and then ends. This year-long bombardment of things that cause us anxiety and frustration seems to have no end. Stress comes when we have something real to worry about. Anxiety comes when things are vague or unknown. I think we have moved on from stress and anxiety to a mild depression. Depression is when we finally feel discouraged and sad over long-term incidents of ‘one danged thing after another’. Covid is so elusive and we do not have enough information for us to know what to do to cope. In fact, it is hugely an ‘unknown’ enemy amidst us and we are Quixote battling windmills while a real threat threads itself closer and closer to our people. We have no lamb’s blood to put on our doors to ward it off. Our body, mind, heart and soul are becoming affected.
Our body begins to show signs. W get uncommon headaches, our sleep patterns are way off, and we feel a general malaise. Our thoughts become a bit muddled as if we are simply going rote through-out the days and we are not sure of time and cannot tell one day from another since they are so much the same. We are not as sharp as we usually would be. We cannot concentrate. We feel what is, at times, overwhelmed,, sad, angry and there seems to be no one cause, but it lies there, just at surface level. Our emotions are all over the place.
All we can do is find a specialist we trust and focus on what they are saying and not falling into the conspiracy traps. It is best not to focus on covid for too long in a day. Simply research your expert’s advice and let it be what it is. No one truly knows much, but what little they know is best to know ourselves. Do not do more than what is essential and find time to comfort oneself in activities that hold your focus. Pamper and take care of self with things that make you feel successful and adequate and that you have accomplished something every day.
We can do this. We must stay Present, not reside in the past and we cannot think to far into the future. Know that we cannot know all things and make do with staying as Present as we can. Validate what you are feeling and its impetus is known: There is a global pandemic. It is here and we cannot know where it is exactly. We have to keep ourselves safe if we have to foray out to do essential business. We have to find ways to nurture ourselves. We need to comfort oneself. We need to reach out to those people in our circle and keep contat with the elderly family and friends. Know that veryone is in the same boat and we are merely padding on a big glassy lake that is bound to feel the winds and storms around us, but we have found ourselves a cove where we feel as safe as we can be. Hang on. Cope however you have usually coped. Find new ways to cope. Learn something new and do not question what ifs. Just Be. Now is the time we can truly know ourselves. Be you! Be that!
©Carol Desjarlais 22.2.21
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