“She held herself until the sobs of the child inside subsided entirely. I love you, she told herself. It will all be okay.” ― Shadow Selves: Double Happiness
How do we find the child within again? How did I/we lose the freedom of childhood that believed in goodness and fairies and the Easter bunny and Santa and that people loved me/us?
Do you remember a time when you felt vulnerable but safe, that you only were asked to just be a kid? Every day was a story, a new story, a story of adventure and magic, and yes, a few sorrows. It was a time when you could write you life story by simply using your imagination. We sailed on clouds in a sea of blue sky. We poled down the ditches on our raft that took us to hidden treasures. We did not care if anyone thought us silly, until they said they did, and then our little hearts were broken. Somehow that broke the magic and we had to grow up ahead of our time. But, oh, those first few years were nothing but magical.
Some of us had our childhood innocence torn from us. But there are ways to go back and rescue that little scared, hurt, little soul. I had the most awesome friend who was a counselor and she was my peer and I trusted her implicitly. I saw her work magic for some of my youthful clients. And, she accepted my plea to help me with some flashbacks that came out of the blue. They had come out of nowhere, when I thought I had healed my broken places. I had not but she helped me go back and rescue that baby girl. A mountain was taken from my shoulders and she challenged me to go back and play and imagine and skip and gather rocks, and go on adventures I loved as a child. I rescued my baby self and then I played. I comforted my inner child. She has never forgotten it and does not cry out in need and hurt since then. Until you have picked up your inner child from an original wounding and rocked her and told her how perfectly perfect and loved she was/is, you have not even a way to imagine how it feels.
Somehow, we need to retrieve some of the imagination, the beliefs, the joyous wonder of our childhood. We need magic and mystery. We need to do those things that awaken the innocence, yes, the innocence, and the world has us know more than we need to have known, to override what we are bombarded with (the fear an anxiety) and find our way to… yes… Wonder. The journey to impulsivity in positive ways needs to be taken up.
I have recently joined The Red Thread group that takes a journey within. There are many groups and I have finally settled into a couple that work on what is called “The Smash Book”. Shiloh Sophia originated the philosophy of Intentional Inquiry and Intuitive gathering of women, in groups that focus on connectedness of women, like the quilting Bees of old, where women gathered and shared wisdom through personal discovery of The Feminine and the wonder and wisdom that gatherings of women can facilitate. Through working in composition books that are intentionally crumpled and allowing our Inner Child/Muse to express its gathered wisdom/collective wisdom through intuitive creation the way a child would draw and paint their own Wonder.
“Intentional Creativity has been a magical method for me personally and as a life coach and licensed spiritual healer. I regularly use Intentional Creativity in my coaching and healing practice because in my experience, it allows us to access information that we didn’t know we had. “ – Shiloh Sophia
The Red Thread evolves from the ideology that, when we are born, there is a Red Thread that connects us to others’ hearts and souls and, although it may tangle and knot, it eventually leads us to a gathering (perhaps a tribe) that we were meant to connect with. It is a philosophy that has women gathering to share wisdom, to unite the world, and we will meet those we are meant to meet. It begins with work on the Inner workings of women where intuition accessed and allowed through Intentional Creativity that develops the connectedness of The Feminine in the world which, eventually, will be the healers of the world. This is how I understand it, and Smash Book work that is a gathering of one’s memories in order to facilitate ancient knowledge of connectedness of women and our connectedness to them. I am new to it all, but have long believed there is a connectedness and I craved the connectedness to the Ancient Feminine. This is one way to access the wisdom of the Inner child that still knew and felt the comfort and safety of a collection of women in one’s life.
May we seek out ways to connect to our ancient knowledge that we inherited from before earthly times, before the forgetting of those ancient connections, before the time when we lost that innocent self-discovery through creating. Each of us has this ancient wisdom. Inner child work can lead us back to the wisdom we carry within, that has been passed down, with the Red Thread of connectedness that we were attached to pre-birth and will follow us throughout our lives. Seek that wonder, that safety, that wonder.
©Carol Desjarlais 15.2.21
You can read more about Shiloh Sophia's movement here:
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