Over-Sensitivity

"Being overly sensitive is when you assume that a person's tone or words were meant to cause you unhappiness. You have a quick reaction to 'perceived' verbal abuse...and might be quick to respond with harsh, insensitive words...or go mute and stop speaking because of how hurt you allowed yourself to become. This is something I am always working on, to live a calmer life and feel less sensitive towards others' comments." - Brother In Law

There is a defensiveness in some of us that seems to be settled in our very marrow.  We can recognize our triggers but when a trigger happens, before we have time to prepare for it, all reason goes away and we react from that place of hurt.  Yes, rejection and abandonment issues are deep and like a stagnant volcano, can erupt.  It seems, to me, that it does not heal for some danged reason.  How do I tame a volcano?  When my psyche perceives a threat, I revert back to verbal fight or flight.  

Perhaps one needs to have some real quiet time to study oneself, to really dig in deep and acknowledge that there is a stagnant volcano and why one erupts and figure out how to stave off a new eruption.  An eruption is the magnitude of pain displayed.  Somehow my nervous system is so danged fragile and I need to learn how to just walk away.  You would think, at 72, I would have figured this out.  I haven't.  Words are only words and I do not have to react to them.  

We all have irrational reactions to things and many of us bruise easily even though we may look like we are tough enough.  Looking at the WHY of things is not some people's gift.  Impulse is huge and, for some, automatic.  I need a sign that says, "Tread carefully when judging or criticizing". That which strikes hard at our heart reminds me how flawed we can be.  I have to rein in my autopilot responses.  I have to desensitize what others say no matter who they are.   I understand what offends me and kicks off the switch but I have to be more diligent in reining myself in.  Feeling hurt by criticism is huge for me.  I need no one's judgments or approval.  I have to put this huge sign up that says:  "You do not have to react to those who care or not.  Care enough for Self."

Challenge:  Is over-sensitivity narcissism, as brother Bobby posted? I am thinking it is, in some way...that turning things in on self.  Can you express your over-sensitive self?  What is an image that expresses the sense of being over-sensitive, how do you project it?

©Carol Desjarlais11.4.19