What things we think are Good, are Pure, are Virtuous, is wholly individualistic. And, we judge and restrain ourselves harder than any other judge, jury and executioner. So many of us think Sacrifice is a Virtue. But how much to sacrifice, what thigs to sacrifice, who to sacrifice for, is really not a selfless action. Where did we get the idea that self-sacrifice was a sign of virtue? That is such a negative energy drain unless it is reciprocal as an energy exchange.
Christianity brought a great deal of power to self-sacrifice having to do with virtue, giving one’s life was the highest virtue. Sometimes I think ‘Self-sacrifice’ and ‘selflessness’ get mixed up. I think it has to do with levels of sacrifice. It can actually, on the selflessness heights, become the martyr syndrome. On the Self-sacrificing, it can become, at its lowest level, cutting and/or scourging. Balance in all things, true?
Selflessness and Self-sacrifice is wired right in to our very DNA as women. We just simply do it rather than think it or plan it. It is reactive, I think. How often have we put our own needs and wants to the side to fulfill someone else’s? In our society, it has been seen as selfish or, worse, expected. When we give, or give service because we feel it is demanded of it, it is no long selfless.
In many religions, it is thought that self-sacrifice is the right way to heaven. Jesus was sacrificed and look how holy. Often this kind of mentality can lead to self-harm, because it was thought that suffering equals righteous. It causes people who are sacrificing, to want a return for their sacrifice. Eventually, most will become feeling used. Some may even manipulate with sacrifice. Real self-sacrifice, the feminine sacrificial energy is about giving of oneself with no expectations. This is tricky because of the Christian culture we all grow up in whether we go to any one church. Our society has adopted the mentality of sacrifice being a virtue, but it is never specific enough.
So, if we stop thinking of self-sacrifice as Sacrifice, and think of it as an energy exchange, it can help us keep the balance. We, then, can have enough energy to say, “Yes, I have enough energy to expend more.” Or, we can say, “I just do not have enough energy for that” and say “no”.
Sacrifice is natural... ok, let us change that, exchanging energy is normal. When we are looking for rewards for it, it is unhealthy and not an exchange of energy but a type of manipulation, however illusionary. If we expect praise or it gives us a sense of entitlement, it is not balanced. If we have a hard time receiving, it means that we are not willing to accept the feminine energy from others and we deny ourselves of that gift. Gratitude is an exchange of energy and most of us have a hard time receiving so that we rob ourself of that extra energy. People who shut themselves in (I do not like people. I do not like groups. I enjoy staying reclusive and sedentary... for instances) rob themselves and others of the sharing of energy.
I love that this is new thought to me. I understand myself better now. I am aware of not sharing energy well. I am a giver but tough for me to receive and I realize that both give energy back and forth. Yes, we are divinely made to share the feminine energy. I am grateful to think of this all in a new way.
*** Art inspired by Christy Sobolewski
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