Everyone has a story. In fact, we have volumes and volumes of stories. We have a timeline and it is full of incidents of plot twists. Just when we thought our life was going one way, off it went in a whole new journey. I could not even begin to draw out my story. There are constant plot twists.
Just the other day, a whole new twist happened to my story. About a year ago, I was contacted on Ancestry.com by a man who asked how we were “closely related”. I had no clue, but the moment I saw his photo, I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that we were related. He could have been ine of my boys. The family resemblances were very obvious. This led he and I on another journey with a purpose to find out how we were related.
Once, we thought we had it, but a week or so ago, the whole plot changed. My “nephew” found his mother, just by chance and lots of contacts, and they are speaking every day on the hone. She has sent along photos and information about “our” family. Hus mother is my neice, iur oldest brother’s daughter. She has photos of our brother, her father, that we have never seen before. There are family photos that we have never seen , of our grandfather. There is genealogy that fills in more blanks of my paternal family. It is a treasure beyond words, to our “great-nephew” and to my brother and I, who were late children of our father, who had four children much older than us. Our siblings could be our parents, there is that age difference. I am looking forward to speaking to my neice, once she gets over the shock oif being found, and explaining that all to who she needs to tell. Then, there is time to fill in more blanks.
As another aside, and another connection, my cousin, nearby, who I am very close to, and who has filled in incredible blanks to who I and my brother are, was actually at this neice’s military wedding. Our grand-nephew has two siblings, a brother and sister, and so the ancestry bank fills out more and more levels of connections. This cannot be described in trite captions or words.
There is a coming home to one’s story as new incidents are revealed. His mother, my neice, was born a month after me, in the same hospital, the same year and, in the cocuments sent is referal to my mother and how kind she was to James’ birth mother. No mention of my brother and I, yet. Our neice and I will one day talk and more of my story will be filled out. As a foundling, these stories make our world make sense.
What a challenge it is to put one’s story to right. Is your story your story or are you going to allow others to write/tell your story from their perspective? If I could encourage one huge undertaking, it is to tell your story. You are the main character I yur story. Delve into who she is. Tell it. Tell it kindly and as gently as you can… but write it down for those who come after to truly know who you were. Let it be your truths not someone else’s. don’t make someone searach for who you are through bits and pieces in order to know who they are. I have learned this on my journey from anonimity to a story that is filling up with rich ancestry and connections. Write it.
©Carol Desjarlais 3.27.22
***Art journal page inspired by Theresa
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