The Art of Patience

 

 

Some of us, me included have spent a lot of time having the patience of a typical teenager.  Life does not cooperate, I have found.  I am always the one there a bit before time for an appointment.  I think growing up with a father who said, “Be in the vehicle in ten minutes if you are going…and he did leave me once to find my way home from a basketball tournament where I was in charge of the concession.  He, too, was impatient and it was harder and herder with him to deal with age because of it.  He could not get enough done in a day, then he could not even do what he usually scheduled in his day to get done, and then he had long hours reading and sitting in front of the tv, and then he spent long hours sitting in his chair under the patio, and then he simply stared out the window, feeling, all the while, a sense of disappointment.  I am all that and will be all that if I do not learn patience.  One thing Covid has taught is patience.  I find it a bit of lethargy, boredom, as life has slowed down to a crawl.  Now we are nearly free of all restrictions, I still do not know what to do with myself. 

Once we identify what the body sense when being impatient, we can, then, do something about it.  I am not one to meditate nor probably ever will, but I am learning how to go to a place and space of timelessness when doing my art.  I should be able to find that in other ways other than art as well.   I recognize my frustration levels and am learning to stop my escalation of anxiety, frustration, anger, etc.  I have witnessed the connection between my thoughts and that which pushes my frustration level.  I plan ahead, if I know there is a chance I will get impatient.  I make sure my Ego/Critical Inner voice/Evil Inner Witch knows I am on guard and what I choose to do with it, not it/them.  I have had to deal with my control issues and realize not everyone runs on the same clock as I do.  Acceptance is huge in this.  As much as I am allowed my timeliness, others are allowed not to have them.  See the control issue in that last sentence.  I allow nothing.  It is not my job.  I am not the whip-carrying time keeper for anyone but myself.  I have to be patient with myself, let alone anyone else.  Slowly but surely, I am getting hold of my impatience. 

Are you an impatient person?  Have you figured out how to control what you can?

©Carol Desjarlais 3.13.22