“We
have all heard that no two snowflakes are alike. Each snowflake takes the
perfect form for the maximum efficiency and effectiveness for its journey. And
while the universal force of gravity gives them a shared destination, the
expansive space in the air gives each snowflake the opportunity to take their
own path. They are on the same journey, but each takes a different path.
Along this gravity-driven journey, some snowflakes collide and damage each
other, some collide and join together, some are influenced by wind... there are
so many transitions and changes that take place along the journey of the
snowflake. But, no matter what the transition, the snowflake always finds
itself perfectly shaped for its journey.
I find parallels in nature to be a beautiful reflection of grand orchestration.
One of these parallels is of snowflakes and us. We, too, are all headed in the
same direction. We are being driven by a universal force to the same
destination. We are all individuals taking different journeys and along our
journey, we sometimes bump into each other, we cross paths, we become
altered... we take different physical forms. But at all times we too are 100% perfectly
imperfect. At every given moment we are absolutely perfect for what is required
for our journey. I’m not perfect for your journey and you’re not perfect for my
journey, but I’m perfect for my journey and you’re perfect for your journey.
We’re heading to the same place, we’re taking different routes, but we’re both
exactly perfect the way we are.
Think of what understanding this great orchestration could mean for
relationships. Imagine interacting with others knowing that they too each share
this parallel with the snowflake. Like you, they are headed to the same place
and no matter what they may appear like to you, they have taken the perfect
form for their journey. How strong our relationships would be if we could see
and respect that we are all perfectly imperfect for our journey.”
― Life, the Truth, and Being Free
You can tell women who are perfecitonists with huge disparity in how they feel about themselves and what they put out there foir others to see. It is comparable to it being said that commedians have huge hurt wihtin and, yet, seem to be the most jovial. Like a woman who plants a smile on her face and yet she has a sad story to tell. To be human, it means to not be perfect, ever, but to be beautifully imperfect with blurred lines of “enough”, ‘goodness’, successful, so that thete is some grace in our lives. Being imperfect is to have grace. We have grace because we are compasssionate with ourselves. We strive to do “better” in cases where we may have wished to be so. But, perfect?
Perfect is said to be free from fault, to be free of defect, to be sdaintly. I have met people who carry some of these traits, as far as I know. We do not ten to look at people’s dark side, unless we have a huge one, ourselves, and then we look for what we see as our faults, in others.
Women tend to express “not enough”, and tend to exaggerate what they sense as their personal shortcomings. This tends to come from something said, or someone criticizing us, when we were young. Society has also vaused a deeper sense of not enough because it is big business to sell “enough” to us.
We have grown up afraid of judgement or disapproval from others. Women who grew up with helicoptre parent(s) (parents who placed too high of expectations, tend to never feel “good enough”. It is a pervasive thing in our lives that is hidden messges in even our culture. We do not see it all as old myths and ways of being, from the past, that we help perpetuate. We do. We judge and criticize other women according to how we feel about ourselves. We see someone do what we think is ‘fail’ and we forgt about the awesomeness between fialure and perfecton – that state of trying an ot mastering, but are not given credit foir the trying. That is where beauty lies.
It is in the falling and rising that there is worthy things. It is between being knocked down and waiting until the coiunt of 9 before getting back up to give it our all, that there is something heroic and wonderful. It is about those who quietly nodded their heads and thought “me too”. Beauty is there between the self-loathing and felt success. We know thus all by heart. None of us has grown up unscathed.
I love women who trip over their own danged selves and burst out in laughter at themselves. Beauty is between the fall down and the moments before we get back up and give it another go. It is in women who are willing to admit what they sense as their imprfections and yet are there being cheerleaders for women who come behind us and we oipe to keep them from feeling like they have failed. My imperfections are before I write a blog and I sense a need to encourage others. It is in me when I see a sisterfriend not make it, that I realize “there but for the grace of god go I”. Beauty is in the moments where we rush to comfort another, because we know how she feels. It is there in women who accept that lif is a whle bunch of sensed “failures” but refust to see that and instead see them as reasons to give it another try another way.
We ae all uniqueky flawed in some way. Our heads seem to be storage tanks for ‘everydangedthingweeverdidsince birth that stains us from the insideout”! We have to fight the foe of critical inner voice that wants us to stay maleable, that wants us to fail, that chides us for even trying to do new things. By understanding that life has been a whle lot of new things to try and/or must be done, that reveals the true self. It is a revoutionary act to stand up for ourslves, to affirm ourselves and others, to choose to love the Divine Feminine in each other. Forget what others define as “enough”, that we are still sitting here in front of a computer shows we are enough. We have not given up the war. We are the women who refuse implied and impressed judgments of others. They only know your bits and pieves… we know our depth of ‘ivercming and attempt to thrive. Thrive on, sisterfriends. Thrive on!
©Carol Desjarlais 3.30.22
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