Sunday, June 2, 2019

On Building Ant-balls and Arks










On Building Ant-balls and Arks

scraping at bark of old trees
causes stories to rise   why scrape at all
if you are not willing to hear
ants running for their lives
ants     creating flotsam of clinging appendages
tangled  and unwilling to concede
ants      making armor of themselves

we need armor
we need to press ourselves together
towards a single saturated goal
sweat of brow and breast
unable to drown solidifying belief
that even if the tree were to fall
or because the tree would fall
they would rise     confused and dazed
in blind     furious    fury of having shade removed
yet  suddenly swimming into spaces
clear enough to see sky

we have lost our homes    our foundations
our land    our wombs    little by little deaths
have undermined roots that thought to hold
yet     unknown       our skill
at unearthing memories we hid
in fist of hearts    

listen to token tales of me      too
that tender shoot      daring to rise again
does not bear reach of your own
push and pull     struggle to break free
on its own     unfurling as if it could
find faith floating amidst so much rubble

we     who have unpinned our pinafores
followed dust motes' dancing
counted cracks in ceilings    
shaved our heads          gone down for third time
despaired at lick and lash of willow branches
found ourselves on surgical tables
spread-eagled under drip and drape
like some funereal ghost ship sent adrift
to have our very wombs ripped out
in order to be given to surrender
to will of some god of saline sanctity
for sake of some strangers
knives in hand
who have whispered they should take
what they could not own

this great womb beneath gnarled roots
deep underground where we have kept quiet
reminders that we are gifted beyond words
to be written on paper that came from these trees
set sail in storms  these tiny paper ships

truths that will blind the deaf     whispers
that dumb cannot see   yes  women who write poems
are more dangerous than pink hats
on ruffled flamingoes      we take hearts of trees
and words carved into branches
to make ourselves arks that will carry us
away from those who would think
to own our bones
our muscles      our deepest reaches
as if they knew nothing of ants
bobbling in bilious floods not needing an ark at all

shhhh     willows      dipping their pens into calm waters
will tell you secrets about old trees
ants and arks and amniotic fluids

©Carol Desjarlais 5.31.19

Let us reach, always to help others, even if we do not know if they need us to or not.  Let us cling together so that we might get through tough things from before, now, and in the future. 

Do not reach for your own comfort.  Reach for someone else who may look like their lives are all roses and sunshine.  Remember, many have shadows you cannot believe.  

©Carol Desjarlais 6.2.19

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