I Forgive Myself: I Love Myself

 

 

 

"When you make a mistake, respond to yourself in a loving way rather than a self-shaming way." – Elle Holcomb

It is a given:  If we cannot fully love ourselves, we cannot fully love others.  If we are not fully compassionate with ourselves, we cannot be fully compassionate towards others.  We can reawaken the Divine Feminine Within if we begin to really focus on practicing this. 

First of all, learn how to forgive yourself.  It is not easy nor does it happen magically.  It takes work.  It takes constant alertness in listening to negative things you are saying to yourself in the background.  We have been taught to judge ourselves and others.  Think how hard it is to just let things be as they are, to let people be as they are. 

We all have shadow areas in ourself.  What was. Is.   No changing.  No fixing.  No obsessing over it all.  See yourself as you are today; ever-changing, ever-progressing, ever-deepening.    I am not who I was a moment ago.  You are not what you were a moment ago.  That ‘s why you are reading, everywhere, to let go and Be Present.  It is in the Present, that you can change things, be things, show things.  Who you are at this moment is pure and ready to take the next small step into the future:  A new you becoming ever-new. 

Stop listening to that inner voice that judges you. Never mind if it is your own voice or you sense it is someone else’s from your past.  You are not that.  They are not them anymore.  Since we are emotional beings and it is in our feminine nature to draw to others, we share our feelings openly.  If we do not, it is because we do not trust ourselves.  Read that again:  If we do not share our feelings openly, it is because we do not trust ourselves.  You must not pass judgement on others deciding what they think of you, how they will react to you.  You are not them.  You are hardly you any more.  It is innately a given that our wisdom is tied to emotions.  It is that our emotions and feelings are tied to our spirit/soul.  In fact, our emotions have been so coerced, so tamped down, so conditioned, that we are more masculine than feminine in our feelings.  When we said ‘equality’, we did not mean this way, did we?  If we try to drown out, push down, deny, avoid, our feelings, we only become more wounded.  We need to continually examine our emotions.

Every night before we go to bed, we need to thank the Divine Being for giving us that day and every morning when we get up, we need to express gratitude for waking up.  We are new as each new day.  Give yourself permission to feel what you feel.  Do not continue the suppress of emotions as we have been taught and conditioned to do.  Feel them.

It is what it is!  If we cannot forgive ourselves, we cannot forgive others.  Think of the burdens you might be carrying because you cannot forgive.  You are hanging on to the remembering past junk.  The harder you hold on to old things you sense as unforgivable, the harder it is for you to progress, physically, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually.  You would be constantly walking in the shadows of non-acceptance, of never seeming to move forward.  Imagine how heavy those burdens of hard feelings as if they were ten ton blocks you are dragging along with you. 

Forgiving oneself means that we love ourself as we are, not as we think we should be, or worse, what others think we should be.  Close the door on yesterdays that cannot be changed.  Then turn and walk into your future, unburdened and ready to make changes so you might live an unencumbered life. 

(This does not mean a forgetting.  Forgetting would stop you from changing things you never want to do, think, be, again.  Simply acknowledge and let go, with great love and humbleness).

©Carol Desjarlais 5.16.22