Journaling Regrets

"Please don’t tell me you don’t have any regrets…please…I beg of you.  Normal people have regrets; it doesn’t make you pathological, it makes you human.

I know what you’re thinking, but all the photos on Facebook with inspirational quotes superimposed on them tell me that having regrets is negative and cynical.  You weren’t thinking that?  Oh, I thought you were.

 “Appreciate everything, regret nothing”

 “Never regret anything because at one time it was exactly what you wanted.” 

Seriously?  Just stop it."

- https://whatsyourgrief.com/journaling-about-regret/

Imagine, it is okay to have regrets.  When it is not okay is when we dwell on them, but, just for an exercise in release, let's do a journal page about regrets and only work on one regret, not the whole lifetime of them no matter what your Ego/Evil Inner Witch says.

Every one of us has something we wish we had done differently.  It is up to us to hang on to it for dear life, or to let it go, growing in depth and we work through it.  Regrets are huge heavy burdens.  Guilt and Regret walk together through our lives.  Part of the letting go is to acknowledge such things that you might regret.  The second things is to really sift through the woulda, coulda, shouldass.  You did or you did not!

Gently walk through one of your regrets.  Really look at it, not with guilt, but with compassionate gentleness.  Very often we did/do what we did/do because we knew no better.  Sometimes we knew better but a straggling negative emotion has us so that we did/do it.  Gird up your loins, sisters, and look deeply.

Be compassionate with yourself as you work through thoughts of your regret.  But, dig deeply.  No shame.  No blame.  You are being a detective here for why you might sabotage yourself by clinging to such regret(s).    There is always "A Why" we do things/did things.   You have to consider what was going on in your life at the time.  You must consider every "WHY" there could be.   You are no longer that person.  You were experienced a moment in time, not this time.  Perhaps you valued different things back then.  Perhaps you did not take an opportunity or you did try something that did not work at that time.  That time is not this time.  Perhaps you needed different things back then.  Have you remained tethered to this regret?  Do you realize that then is not now?  Give yourself credit to wishing you might have done differently.  Are you lugging that regret around like a ball and chain?  Why would you do this to yourself?  It no longer applies.    Honor that you are no longer in that situation to make those/that same decisions(s).  

Now, take a breather.  It is not easy to go back and sort through something we held like a sore appendage.  It is not WHAT happened, but WHY it happened.  It is time to stop wasting energy on past crap.  This is now and now you are going to write, draw, collage that away from you with great love and devotion to the changes you have made in your life since then.

What color was your regret?  What symbols, what words, what phrases?  What could symbolize your Regret?  What objects could you use to express Regret?  Simply open your journal and begin.  Choose soothing music, perhaps, sip a cup of favorite tea, burn some incense and slowly begin to do a page on Regrets.  (Remember; do not do a whole hoost of them, just work on one.) Much love and light as you work through this.

©Carol Desjarlais 8.15.19