Bit by bit, it seems things are beginning to fade, and not just my hair color. The way we collect information, and deepen knowing, is through our senses. Slowly things begin to fade. The fear of losing one’s eyesight is terrifying, betimes. Perhaps I fear loss of that sense the most. As our hearing, taste, smell and touch wane, we feel waves of loss. I am not, personally, aware of losing any other sense but I surely notice my eyes have changed, a great deal. I have a sense that the gradual loss of senses, will curtail our ability to communicate with others and enjoy activities to a deeper level. It, as well, causes us to become more isolated. How do we raise our ‘knowing’ and find ways to compensate? How much of our personality goes as we age?
I am sure that we need to still have adventures, still solve natural mysteries to our own satisfaction. We still have to find ways to grow and not stagnate. Life is complex, even though life seems to slow down as we age. Ego sems to quieten, I have found, thank goodness, because, although Ego is, in part, our wisdom collected over a lifetime, it is also our worst critic. Ego is hyper aware of our losses and can have us feel discouraged. We cannot let that happen to us. Somehow, we have to stay positive and actively finding ways to be inspired, to be encouraged, to be brave. I know that my hours of arting really help me be positive and able to cope with the fading of other areas of my life.
I am adamant that I do not give up hiking in the mountains in search of beautiful gemstones. There is one elderly man who comes when we are going to be in areas that he can navigate, comes in a wheelchair. I have not met him yet, but I am sure that would inspire. I work hard at staying positive yet acknowledging that my body is changing in small increments. Sometimes it seems sudden, but it is my awareness of amounts of loss that comes quickly. It is as if we live in denial of these senses until, suddenly, we miss them. Finding ways to reignite our senses is imperative. Mixed media is a great way to refine what sense we have left, Going out in nature and taking notice of what we see, feel, hear, taste, and smell, in micro-attentiveness, will reacquaint our body with things we may have let pass before.
I wonder if our personality seems to be calmer, to be more evocative, and tends to make up for what else fades? Does our personality refine itself, by dumping some of the negatives? Do we become grumpy old women or calm, knowing, older women? I am pretty sure, as we age, we have more time to dump the negatives. This ought to be my main focus as other focuses fade.
Fearing aging can only make things worse. Yes, we might lose some of our seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and sense of touch. Yes, we can find new ways to heighten and change in order to keep balance in our lives, to keep wonder, adventure, and awe an important part of our lives. What do we do to do this? How are you making sure you keep sense awake?
©Carol Desjarlais 10.04.20
No comments:
Post a Comment