When Enough Is Enough

At some point, we have to stop feeling like we are not enough…ENOUGH!  Will we ever accept our unique self as simply our AUTHENTIC unique self?  It matters not a whiff if others ‘get’ you.  It matters not if someone over there seems more ‘perfectly _____” than we are.  They are not on your journey.  Their purpose on earth is not yours.  Never mind that others JUDGE you… YOU are judging yourself harshly, most likely.  “Give it up,” I tell myself often.  Give up trying to be more perfect than everyone else.  

If we have lived present and within our potential. of what we know when we know it, we have lived, loved, lost and have been swimming upstream all the days of our life.  Give what compassion, you give to others, to yourself.  Give what understanding you offer others, to yourself.  We have learned mighty lessons – each of us- under the dome of your unique life.  

No pill, no medicine person, no exercise, no food, no clothes, no hairstyle will ever change you on the inside.  No offering up your pound of flesh, no begging, borrowing, stealing, will ever make you anything more than what you are this moment.  If we do not allow ourselves to muddle in a puddle of misery, and stride forward every day….every danged day… we are progressing.  No hiding yourself away, locking up your heart, refusing to commu8ne and partake of life as it comes at you, will ever make you someone else.  You are who you are.  I am who I am.  

We all have days, moments, when we are not perfectly ourselves.  I have no filter so I am likely to say some pretty dumb things.  I am impulsive so I might, ok, most likely WILL, do some pretty dumb things.  It takes a while for me to lose my patience but I do, and it is not pretty, and I am working on it.  We are learning lessons, every moment we breathe.  Breathe through it.  We all feel shame, guilt, embarrassed, uncomfortable and sense impending doom of some kind, some times, maybe, all the time, but it is up to us to crawl out under from that and make our own way towards something we sense is better.  I know, for a fact, if we plow through the hard times, we eventually come out a better person, more brave, strong, courageous, and willing to face another day.

Our joy comes from within, not from without.  Yes, something triggers our joy, but it is FELT within.  No one, absolutely no one or nothing, can make you feel anything you DO NOT WANT to feel.  Read that again!  It is absolutely true.  We have all our answers, within.  WE have our own healing within.  Yes, our chosen JOY comes from within, so does our chosen sadness.  

Yes, someone in our past might have had us chose to take the negative and it made our life hard, or we LET it make our life sad, hurt wounded, etc.  But that was then and this is now and it is our responsibility to heal and learn the lessons and trudge forward.  It makes us great counsellors and cheerleaders for those coming behind us that may be going through their own dark night of the soul.  Do not use old traumas and wounds to define us.  We are not our trauma.  We are who we are IN SPITE of it and we are way more knowing and stronger for having gotten through it all.  Some of us are simply more sensitive so some things are those that we allow to hurt us deeper and more long-lasting than it needs to. We are, indeed, coordinators of our own beings.  Hold your banner high:  we are survivors, overcomers and thrivers.  Do not let surviving define you until you have done the work to get through overcoming so we can thrive.  It neve r happens overnight and it never happens without deep soul work.  That is the work most worthy to be doing.  We are, each, as, I have said, “Answers to some ancient grandmother’s’ prayers.  Be that!  Although we do not see the sunrise, we believe in dawn.  

Get rid of critical people in your life.  Get rid of the ‘downers’, get rid of the ‘sap-suckers’.  Life is hard enough without allowing others to drag you back, drag you down, and attempt to put out you little light that only you see.  

You do not run your whole life.  Life runs it by creating obstacles and mountains and deep holes, and hidden dangers.  That is life.  It also offers you mountain vistas, easy-rolling plains, river walks, lakes to cool yourself in, waterfalls, and misty mornings, and dark rainy days, and hurricanes, and tsunamis, and…  well, it can throw you some real hard lessons to learn.  Do not let your Evil Inner Witch of an inner voice, your Ego, your negative self-talk, your limbic lizard brain to cause you to fight or flee.  Solve your own problems so you have tools for solving more that might come your way... no downer self-critical voice to listen to.  You, alone, can change negative self-talk and you can change your old, stale, negative beliefs about self.  Don’t let negativity attach in any way.  Rebuke and refuse it!

None of us… not one of us… is “perfect” because who knows what perfect is.  Our perfectness is not attached to someone else to define.  When we are AUTHENTIC, we are as perfect as we can be at that moment and that is ENOUGH.

Be the magic of Enough…  someone, somewhere, needs your flawed beautiful self in order to believe that they might be enough too.  If we were all perfect, there would be no hope for those struggling along the way to their own Enouigh!  Be kind to Self and Others.  Creator is not finished with us until we are finished down here on Mother Earth.

©Carol Desjarlais 7.5.20.