“Some days I am more wolf than woman, and I am still learning how to stop apologizing for my wild.” -
Personified, Shakti is the gentle consort of Shiva, the Hindu Goddess. Or, she can be a terrifying destroying force. She is seen as the right hand of the Supreme Being and can take many forms. She is called upon for strength, for courage, as a Mother Goddess or fierce warrior. She is the ultimate feminine divine mother who encourages relationship comfort, devotion and power of creativity. She is seen as the sum of all Goddesses. Her adoration came from a matriarchal culture around 2500 BC before the Aryans took over. She is believed to teach us that woman comes because men needed the feminine and they were dependent upon the feminine for life, food and she manifests in aspects of all life, deaths, illnesses and yet embodies the creativity of the arts, of dance, of prosperity. Hindu believe that every woman is a vessel of shakti with both creative and destructive powers. She calls to us to identify and express our deepest soulful gifts with each other, to be sure of self-care in order to do so, and to be the most authentic core soul/spirit you are.
Of course, we all have our dark side. They are as much a gift as our light side. We need to identify those gifts and so we must look at things like this:
We all have “meme” stories that come from Ego formation that came to be when we did. Is your story negative or positive and does it send out positive energy?
Shakti is known as the yoga goddess and suggests we all need to find a way to meditate on our deepest soul/spiritual incidents… in the PRESENT... and focusing on your very heart of all matters.
Learning to stop the negative introspection, force your mind to think of positive. It does not mean that negative is not going to happen, it means that you will not have an emotional reaction to it. Man, this one is tough for me. Trying to distance from my Ego is difficult. I get so insulted and I, immediately turn into the defensive wolf instead of the loving, forgiving, releasing wolf.
Once you know you do react from Ego, it is easier to go deeper into attempting to control those negative reactions. Ego very often comes from the trauma-based thinking where we see ourselves as victim rather than thriver. Negative/Ego reactions can become habits... do become habits just like our beliefs.
Yes, we have all known pain and emotional pain. We all have a choice whether to let that be our whole story or one that speaks to our courage and bravery. Women are such healers. Turn that healing on your story and make conscious efforts to find the gift in the painful, wounding lessons.
We all have a sense of what is right or wrong, good or bad, and we set those as if they needed to be permanent. And we are most judicious of ourselves. Sometimes we need to give ourselves a break and look at how rigid our values and morals and ideas of how others should be is. Be elastic with others and ourselves, when you realize that you might be rigid in some areas.
“Even if you can be aware of your awareness for only a moment, in that moment you will touch the primal awareness/bliss at the core of yourself.” - Awakening Shakti
When you sense that old habits are returning and you are slipping into self-imposed or social conditioning that sets off some kind of negative trigger, be aware and stop your negative thoughts.
We are so much more than our human experiences. Shakti reminds us that each of us is, in some way, a goddess. We are souls having an earthly experience. We are gifts to the world. You and I are all gifts to each other. Emotions and negative thinking should not be allowed to drive what kind of gift we are.
I choose to do Theresa's challenge October 10th as neurography with a twist. I am the wolf. I can be loyal, loving, compassionate, forgiving, or I can be a Kali figure of Wolf destruction. I have to remember I mean to be a loving wolf. To do this, I need to thoughtfully, take hold of the awareness of present moments and be what I mean (and, most likely what I was born to be) a loving wolf.
©Carol Desjarlais 10.14.21
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