Pomona: Self-neglect

 

 

 

If an apple blossom or a ripe apple could tell its own story, it would be, still more than its own, the story of the sunshine that smiled upon it, of the winds that whispered to it, of the birds that sang around it, of the storms that visited it, and of the motherly tree that held it and fed it until its petals were unfolded and its form developed. - Lucy Larcom

Pomona is often associated with Demeter.  She is a Roman Goddess of fruit trees, gardens and orchards, especially Apple.  She is associated with the harvest.  Her symbol is the cornucopia. 

It is said that Pomona was too busy to get involved in love and turned down several proposals before she was tricked by Vertumnus who made her think he was an old woman who needed her to live with her/him. 

She was a nurturer and a goddess of dedication.  She was, like most of us, life giver and devotion and patience and unconditional love.  She easily forgave.  She was so busy busy and she forgot to take time for herself.  Her actual festivities are held November 1, when there was a feast held to celebrate the harvest of fruits and nuts and grapes. 

She, also, put others before herself, all the time. And, her shadow side, as all Goddesses and ourselves have, she could devour and abandon and even sometimes she could be abusive in that she would, on her dark days, use guilt to manipulate.

Women have less leisure time than men do.  We are on task 24 hours a day when we are needed, and throughout childbearing years, it is often needed.  In order for us to cope and to thrive, we need something that is just for us, a time and space and place to do absolutely exactly as we choose.  And this is so important a thing to develop for when we retire and we have 24/7 time that can lead to many problems, if we do not have a hobby or a something that gives us a break away from the mundane. 

If we do not learn how to rest, to relax, to restore, then we are asking for big stress trouble in all four areas of our lies:  Physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual.  Self-neglect is self-abuse.

With the coming of thanksgiving, there will be many many tired, worn-out, stressed women preparing cleaning, serving, cleaning, ad-nauseum.  Yes, it is wonderful to be able to gather as family and/or friends.  Yes, it is lovely to have a sparkling clean house.  Yes, it is wonderful to have everything done for a well-turned-out table.  Yes, there are going to be dishes and after-party cleaning.  Share the load, ladies.  Share the load.  Find some time for yourself in there somewhere.

©Carol Desjarlais 10.8.21