“I’m only asking you to come into my house with respect. To serve you I do not need your devotion, but your sincerity, nor your beliefs, but your thirst for knowledge. Enter with your vices, your fears and your hatreds, from the greatest to the smallest. I can help you dissolve them. You can look at me and love me as a female, as a mother, as a daughter, as a sister, as a friend, but never look at me as an authority above yourself. If your devotion to any God is greater than your devotion to the GOD WITHIN YOU, you offend both of them and offend the one”- found written in the temple of the goddess
The Roman Goddess’s name, Sekhmet, comes from the English translation of a word meaning Powerful One (sometimes violent and terrible one). Her color is red and her symbol is the lion. She is often portrayed with a lion’s head instead of humanoid features. When the god Ra was disappointed in his beings trying to usurp his power and goodness, and had forgotten about him as they worshipped other things instead of him, he was angry enough to want to kill off all his creations on Mother Earth. But there were other high gods that he had to council with before that could happen. They finally agreed that Ra should send his eye, his daughter, for punishment instead of him destroying everything. And, so, Sekhmet was created.
She was horrible. She spread diseases, petulance, and epidemics and was truly a great destroyer in her rage and anger. Ra had to do something to stop all this. He made a special drink, out of beer and red ochre, that looked like the blood of her victims she drank, to make Sekhmet dozy. He caused a flood of it and the lioness fell asleep and when she woke, she forgot all about humanity’s betrayal to her father. In fact, she had turned into a peaceful kitten. (This transformation came from her seeing the ‘light’ and changing her ways). She saw what damage she had caused and became protector of those with disease and those in epidemics. The energy she spent in violence and rage, she spent on protection of her father’s people. The change in her, changed Egypt. The lived-in fear of waking Sekhmet’s anger. They honor her and honored her father with celebrations and great barrels of pomegranate wine. The last thing they ever wanted was for Sekhmet to become angry again.
Look, we all have tempers, we all have anger, it was gifted us by Creator, but for the good energy that can come from such. It is anxiety. It is feeling wronged. It is pain. It is discomfort. It is shame. It is feeling devalued. It is fear. Anger is the easiest emotion to feel/show and is often a ‘go to’ for many of us and a ‘stand in’ for what we are really feeling. In fact, sometimes, I think my anger is faster than my thoughts, betimes. We resent being critiqued. We resent misogyny. We rebel. We resent being ruled by authority, sometimes. We cannot abide being victimized (or feeling so). We resent bad karma, we earned, that comes on us, seemingly, at the drop of a hat. It belongs to the very core of our identity. What we do with that God-given emotion makes the difference. The action that comes from feeling angry can change the world.
We have more power than we can believe. If we do not control our anger, we can be very very destructive. We need to make sure our anger is constructive. We can transform our anger into something that moves mountains. It can be the solution to many problems. We can either be dark women or light women. Rather than have the kind of anger to apologize for, own it.
When you feel it coming… pause. Sit with your feelings of anger. Your inner child is about to have a temper tantrum. Know what it is really signalling. And, dangit it is difficult because the longer we have let it roil and boil inside, the greater it wants to be. Know it for what it is. Then, decide whether you are about to destroy things or whether you are going to use your anger in a positive way. Understand that anger, out of control, is a huge waste of energy, of strength and of resilience.
I know for a fact that I have anger issues that are cover-up for other emotions. I have had to work very hard to control that emotion. It will still seep out every few years. It took the Bee Man five years to see my anger. “Wow,” he said, “you DO have a temper.” It was not directed at him, of course, but others that I felt insulted me, dishonored me, used me. I had not let my anger out on them, but had gone outside where I was rumbling and mumbling while, yes, walking in a circle (as I always have when I am dealing with something and giving myself a danged good talking too). I am sure it will be a lifelong work.
We do not want to be known as an angry person. We do not even mean to be a negative person. We do not mean to punish like Sehkmet. We want to transform into Baset, the kitten. We want to change things but reactive punishing anger towards others and things does nothing other than make us feel more powerless. We hate that we are powerless to control ourselves... and that, sisters, is the key. We are NOT powerless. We CAN control ourselves. In order to control ourselves, we need to dig deep and really study our core values. We want to be cherished. We have to cherish others in order to know what ‘cherish’ means. Once we know what ‘cherish” means, we need to turn it inwards and recognize ourselves for the beautiful gift WE are. Come, let us find a way to exert our power in positive ways.
©Carol Desjarlais 7.16.21
No comments:
Post a Comment