Thursday, December 26, 2019

The Grinch





The Grinch is depicted as a hairy, pot-bellied, pear-shaped, snub-nosed creature with a cat-like face and cynical personality. In full-color adaptations, he is typically colored avocado green. He has spent the past 53 years living in seclusion on a cliff, overlooking the town of Whoville... The Grinch has become an icon of anti-Christmas and the anti-winter holidays, as a symbol of those who despise the holiday, much in the same nature as the earlier character of Ebenezer Scrooge. - Wikipedia 

Yes, there are Grinches, and yes, they are people with problems with the celebration and/or all it stands for.  There are people incapable of feeling happiness.  Did you know that?  Incapable.  As all the foofoorah and happy happy of Christmas, they become more alienated, more unhappy, more overwhelmed. Some are so finanacially strapped that it is difficult to be happy.  And, for some, there has been a tragedy or heartbreak around Christmas and each year only brings that to the forefront.  Most do feel a loss of mother, sister, aunt, friend, and this year has been difficult and the loss is felt more. 

"The Grinch hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season!
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all,
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small."
-The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, Dr. Seuss

All of us have losses, some of us feel a new loss every day as we age.  There is something about Christmas that might make us feel loss, impending doom, or whatever anxiety can build.  Some of us are very conscious we do not have much more than ten more Christmases at best (average lifespan is 81 years of age). Some feel guilty because they have alienated family in some way.  Some feel self-destructive more so at Christmas.  Some are pessimists.  Some of us are eternal Grinches about everything and want to rain/snow on everyone's parade.  What we forget is, we do not have to feel happy inside, but we should not set out to make everyone else as miserable as we are.  We all have an Inner Grinch somewhere, sometime.

Our critical Evil Inner Witch can be brash and difficult around this season.  Some come across as harsh and critical and punishing, and unfriendly, and sit in their muddle of a puddle of self-pity.  We forget that our job here is partially to help each other, to care for each other, and their self-pity has them sink totally into the memememememe.  Youa re only the center of your own world, not everyone's and this is hard to take if you are typically a self-centered person.  We all know those grumpy old men and women in the nursing homes that forget that there a many more patients in that very room.  They make life difficult for their loved ones by sinking into the last conscious, pertinent; now, last thoughts and they were miserable then and continue to be.  Lord, keep me from this. 

During this time of year our Evil Inner Grinch can surely show up.  We get all concerned over our own wants and needs and it can make you feel miserable if not BE miserable.  Now that all the hubbub of Christmas Day is over, it is easy to slide into 'let down' of many kinds. Our Evil Inner Grinch will feed the sense of loneliness once the company is gone, or that company never came.  It may have you feel unloved, alone, isolated, unappreciated, etc. 

Once you EIG gets on a roll, if you ahve not learned how to halt it, it will go on and on all the way back to the misery of your childhood, whether it was or not.  It will criticize everything you think you did well and have you feeling like you, somehow, did not succeed in having a Merry Christmas, whether you did or not. 

We all have this Evil Inner Grinch who goes by many names, or un-anted, at all.  It is our critical self-talk that is pure negativity.  Dr Seuss had a friend who was a Grinch before the term was coined.  He wrote about his 'sour friend' in The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.  We all desire love, friendship, and the Christmas Spirit is joy in the heart.  We need to maintain the positive feelings that Christmas should bring, no matter what we have to do to keep it real and keep it positive.  Appreciate others.  Appreciate others' joy. Don't be a Grinch who wants to ruin joy for others.

©Carol Desjarlais 12.26.19 

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