Abandonment

 

 

Gemini switches over to Cancer and our sensitivity to being abandoned, in some way, is definitely heightened.  Today moving into Cancer, it will be a day of inner drama as we sense a fear of abandonment of some kind.  It is not a good feeling and those of us who have chronic feelings of such, we will truly feel it.  I have, somehow, happened to have come to a place where I love being alone, with my thoughts, with my art, and with my memories.  Many times, I do not go where others are going to be because I fear feeling like the fringe person I am.  I have ben affected by my Primal Wound Abandonment issues all my life and, once I knew what the key trigger was, I have worked on that.  When my maternal and paternal families found me, I began to feel like I fit in but still there is a deep psyche feeling of being on the fringe of even that.  It is strange that, although I was #5 of 12, I feel more like a younger sibling rather than one of the older ones.  Acceptance is huge and if even one person in your birth family does not accept you, it rubs ones self-confidence raw.  Along with abandonment feelings, there is always work to let go of the past because, such as we, will always feel sensitive and forgiving but it remains raw.  These kinds of things will be heightened today. 

 Abandonment issues of a different kind come when we age and we know our body is slowly declining.  Our health is not what it was, our energy is not what it was, our intelligence is not what it was, our emotions are heightened, and our spirt, although strong, wavers along with emotions.  We feel our body, mind, heart and soul is abandoning us in some way.  This kind of thing will be heightened.  Aging causes changes we are not in control of.  We experience many ups and downs throughout a day. 

Today will be a ‘drop’ things day.  You will feel nostalgic for when you really did feel a belonging.  Your memories will flood back and you either control the day through taking the path of sensing abandonment or you can walk the path of positive abandonments.  Man, we are heroines.  We have been brave, strong warriors, or we would not have gotten this far.  We have all kinds of new belongings if we are grateful and positive.  A fake positivity will not cut it because it does not go soul deep. 

 

©Carol Desjarlais 2.28.23